Most situations that you will encounter in Residence Life can be handled easily by following the ABCs of Confrontation (make sure to read that article if you haven’t done so already!). But, whether there are residents who aren’t ready to take responsibility for their actions or some other factor occurs, there may be some occasions when the process cannot be easily followed. Here are some considerations to take into account if you come across a situation that adds a layer of complexity to your policy violation confrontation.
When to Reconsider the Process:
There is no response when you attempt to confront the situation. I once had RAs call me because they heard music playing from several doors away while they were doing rounds at 2:00am. Then the music stopped but there was loud conversation happening inside. When the RAs knocked and announced themselves, there was no acknowledgement from the residents in the room; they just kept talking. As the on-call staff member, I went to the room and confirmed that I heard the talking and, after knocking, still didn’t get the attention of the residents who were presumed to be inside the room. We keyed into the room and, to our surprise, did not find any residents: a podcast was playing at a significantly loud volume to an empty room. In a later conversation, the resident said they had music playing but believed that the podcast automatically started playing once the playlist had ended. If you’re in a situation where residents don’t respond after you knock and announce yourselves, you likely need to call up the ladder to get support from your on-call professional staff member.
The residents respond in a hostile manner. In another situation, I had RAs who were doing rounds at 10:00pm and had to remind a student that quiet hours had started. The student was very frustrated that he was being told to quiet down: the World Series was on and he apparently felt that his cheers and belligerent screaming at the game was justified. The RAs let the resident know that it was just a warning and continued on with their rounds. About 30 minutes later they received a call from a neighboring resident complaining that the student was continuing to yell at the top of his lungs. When the RAs returned to the student’s door, he began yelling at them and using inappropriate language toward them, using derogatory terms as they were both female-identifying staff. While the RAs did not call up to professional staff in this situation, it would have been appropriate given the student’s actions. If strong language is being used against you or if you feel a situation is growing aggressive, do not hesitate to call University Security or your professional staff member on-call. Make sure to make your safety a priority. In this situation, my RAs elected to not call up but had direct quotes from the resident, which were helpful to reference during the student’s conduct meeting.
The situation necessitates a response from up the supervisory chain. There will be different policy violations that you will learn of as a student staff member that may be above your pay grade, resulting in the need to call your professional staff member on-call. Two specific situations that may need professional assistance could be if sexual misconduct has taken place or if a student is having suicide ideation. While these concerns are often rare, it is important that you have a strong understanding of what your department’s processes are and when you need to call your professional staff member on-call, University Security, or another campus or community resource. It’s important to do your best to pause the situation if you need to call someone so that the student does not have to repeat their story several times as it could be triggering or traumatizing for them.
When to Stay the Course:
No policy violation is found. Let’s continue to use the alcohol example from the original article. You made it to the step of confronting the situation but the residents did not bring any alcohol to the center of the room. The students also were cooperative when opening their refrigerator, closet, drawers, and any other hiding spots where the alcohol could be and none was found. While there is no policy violation within the room that you have found, it is still important to follow through on the steps. You should still share that you need to write a report but will note that no alcohol was found as had previously been suspected. Why? If there are several reports of the room having large gatherings of people with clinking glass bottles and nothing is ever found by staff, it may be something the Hall Director wants to look into further by meeting with the residents. The room owner could be a social individual who shares a lot of soda in glass bottles with friends. They could also just be really good at hiding potential policy violations. Either way, a conversation to address the pattern with the resident could be helpful for the Hall Director.
Residents are disrespectful. There’s a fine line between disrespectful and hostile and you will be the only one who is able to determine when someone crosses that line for you. Some staff member will be more tolerant to some behavior than others, so it’s really up to you when certain behavior or actions necessitate the response of a professional staff member on-call to assist. If there is an adverse response from residents, most of the time it will just remain disrespectful. It could be taking a long time to answer the door or just opening the door a crack rather than all the way. It could be residents who share minimal information or lie about what was actually happening to help insulate themselves from responsibility. What is most important when this occurs is to document it as clearly as possible within the incident report. If you catch a resident in a lie or if they refuse to follow your directions, include that! It’s something I always followed-up on when it came to conduct meetings, asking why residents behaved a certain way.
Are there any grey areas that you’re thinking of that may change your approach with the ABCs of Confrontation? Make sure to have a conversation with your supervisor about potential what-ifs that are going through your mind. And, when the unexpected variables inevitably rise up, make sure that you follow your training and have a debrief conversation with your supervisor on what went well and what should be done differently next time. As ResLife staff, we do our best to ensure student staff are trained and prepared for a variety of situations. By following the ABCs of Confrontation, you can handle a vast majority of these situations with ease.
