Adapted from: Wherever You Go, There You Are
College life is a whirlwind. Between classes, work, and the ever-present social scene, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed as a residential life student staff member. You’re not just a student anymore – you’re a leader, a confidant, an event planner, an academic advisor, and sometimes, a crisis counselor all rolled into one. While it’s incredibly rewarding to support your residents, the constant demands can take a toll.
Enter mindfulness. It’s not a magic bullet, it’s not having a blank mind, it’s not ignoring your problems, but it’s a powerful tool that can help you navigate the chaos that comes with the busy college life. Mindfulness is the practice of paying attention in a particular way: on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally. Here’s how incorporating the seven core principles of mindfulness can make you a better staff member, student, and person your residents can come to for support:
1. Non-Judging: Witnessing the Storm
Imagine a resident comes to you with a late-night crisis. It’s easy to fall into the trap of internal judgment – “They shouldn’t have stayed out so late,” or “Why are they coming to me with this?” But mindfulness encourages you to step back and be an impartial observer. Listen actively, without labeling their emotions or assigning blame. This creates a safe space for residents to confide in you and allows you to offer more effective support.
2. Patience: Blooming When It’s Time
Sometimes, residents won’t open up right away. They may need time to process their emotions or feel comfortable sharing. Mindfulness cultivates patience – a recognition that things unfold in their own time. Instead of getting frustrated or trying to force a conversation, offer a safe space and be there when they’re ready. Remember, building trust takes time, and patience shows your genuine care and willingness to listen.
3. Beginner’s Mind: Learning Anew
Every resident you encounter is an individual. While you may have experience with similar situations, resist relying solely on past solutions. Approach each interaction with a “beginner’s mind,” curious and open to learning. This allows you to tailor your support and fosters a deeper connection with each resident.
4. Trust: Leaning on Your Inner Compass
Being a Res Life staff member often means making quick decisions. Mindfulness encourages you to develop trust in yourself and your intuition. Take a moment to connect with your inner voice before reacting. Are you feeling overwhelmed or emotionally charged? Step back, breathe (more on that later!), and then make a balanced decision based on your own best judgment and the needs of the situation.
5. Non-Striving: The Beauty of Now
It’s easy to get caught up in the “to-do” list of a Res Life staff member – resolving conflicts, planning programs, talking to residents, enforcing policies, and attending meetings. Mindfulness reminds us that the goal isn’t to achieve a specific outcome, but to be present and aware in the moment. Focus your attention on the resident in front of you, not the next task on your agenda. This fosters genuine connection and allows you to be more present in your interactions.
6. Acceptance: Embracing Reality
Sometimes, situations will be challenging. There will be residents you can’t “fix,” and conflicts that feel impossible to resolve. Mindfulness encourages acceptance – seeing things as they are, without judgment or negativity. This doesn’t mean giving up, but rather recognizing that you can’t control everything. Instead, focus on what you can influence, such as your response and how you approach the situation.
7. Letting Go: Releasing the Grip
We all have triggers – late-night noise complaints, messy common areas, disrespectful behavior. Mindfulness helps you acknowledge these triggers, but not hold onto them. Imagine your stress as a clenched fist. Practice letting go – taking a deep breath and allowing the tension to dissipate. This doesn’t mean ignoring problems; it simply means approaching them with a calmer, more collected mind.
Integrating Mindfulness: Your Daily Moment of Being Present
So, how can you integrate mindfulness into your daily life as a student staff member? Even small practices can make a big difference:
- Start your day with a few minutes of mindful breathing. Focus on your breath going in and out, noticing the rise and fall of your chest. This simple exercise can set the tone for a more grounded day.
- Take mindful walks around campus. Pay attention to the sights, sounds, and smells around you. Notice the details you might normally miss while rushing from place to place.
- Set aside time for reflection. Journaling or meditation can help you identify triggers and develop coping mechanisms.
- Use your Res Life Connections. Sharing your plans and intentions with your peers and supervisors in Res Life can help you create accountability for yourself and give you much needed community support!
Remember, mindfulness is a journey, not a destination. There will be days when you feel more present than others. But by incorporating these practices into your routine, you’ll cultivate a sense of calm and clarity that will benefit you in all aspects of your life – as a Res Life staff member, a student, and a supportive member of your residential community. So take a deep breath, embrace the present moment, and watch yourself become the best version of yourself, both for yourself and for the residents you support.
